The Pink in Progress reading list

Some of the most important conversations of your life might happen with a book. On a couch during nap time, in a hotel room after a long day, in the car line with an audiobook playing. The right book at the right moment can feel like a friend who finally gets it.

So we put together the Pink in Progress reading list: fourteen books our community keeps coming back to, from the Gabby Bernstein book everyone talks about to reads on motherhood, friendship, grief, burnout and building habits that stick.

Each one has a short note on why we love it, who it’s best for and, when it fits, a post from our journal to read alongside it. You don’t need to read them all, or in order, or at all this month. Pick the one that speaks to the season you’re in.

How we picked

This isn’t a list of every self-help bestseller ever written. We chose books that match what we care about at Pink in Progress: strength, community and real life. Every book on this list:

• Speaks to women in real seasons of life, like new motherhood, divorce, grief, burnout or starting over.
• Is kind. No shame, no “bounce back” pressure and no impossible standards.
• Gives you something to do, not just something to think about.
• Is widely loved and easy to find, at bookstores, libraries and audiobook apps.

A quick note: these are books, not treatment plans. If you’re struggling with your mental health, a book can be a wonderful companion, but please also reach out to your doctor or a licensed therapist. And a few of these authors take a spiritual approach, so take what helps and leave the rest.

One more thing: you don’t have to agree with everything in a book to get something out of it. Some of our favorite reads have a chapter or two we skipped, an idea we pushed back on or a tone that took some getting used to. Read like you’re talking with a smart friend, not taking orders. Keep what feels true for your life and let the rest go. That’s a skill in itself, and honestly, it’s a pretty good one for life too.

We’ve grouped the books into five themes so you can jump straight to what you need. If you’re in more than one season at once (and who isn’t?), feel free to mix and match.

Each book links to Amazon so it’s easy to grab a copy, an ebook or the audiobook. You can also find every book here at your local library, often for free.

Quick picks by mood

Not sure where to start? Find the line that sounds most like you right now:

• “I’m anxious and need comfort.” Start with The Universe Has Your Back.
• “I’m carrying everyone’s stuff.” Try The Let Them Theory or Fair Play.
• “I’m so hard on myself.” Reach for Self-Compassion or The Gifts of Imperfection.
• “I’m exhausted all the time.” Burnout was written for you.
• “I just became a mom and don’t recognize myself.” Read Matrescence.
• “Everyone has an opinion about how I feed my baby.” Pick up Cribsheet.
• “I’m lonely.” Platonic is a hopeful place to start.
• “I’m grieving.” It’s OK That You’re Not OK, gently, at your own pace.
• “My life is changing and I want to listen to myself.” Untamed.
• “I keep starting over.” Atomic Habits, then maybe a coach.

✨ For a calmer, braver mindset

Books for the days your brain won’t stop spinning. These are about letting go of what you can’t control and trusting yourself a little more.

1. The Universe Has Your BackGabrielle Bernstein

   The Universe Has Your Back

   Gabrielle Bernstein · 2016

   The Gabby Bernstein book most people mean when they say “that Gabby book.” It’s a spiritual, gentle read about trading fear for trust, with short lessons and simple practices you can use on hard days. If you like a little woo with your self-help, start here.

   Best for: Anxious overthinkers who want comfort and a calmer outlook.

   Try this: Read one short chapter in the morning and pick one idea to carry through your day. It’s a great book to keep on the nightstand.

   Find it on Amazon
2. Happy DaysGabrielle Bernstein

   Happy Days

   Gabrielle Bernstein · 2022

   Gabby’s more personal book about healing from past pain and finding peace, written with a lot of honesty about her own story. Heavier than her earlier books, but many readers say it’s her most meaningful.

   Best for: Women ready to look at old wounds with compassion, ideally alongside a therapist.

   Try this: Go slowly. Take breaks, journal as you go and bring anything heavy to a therapist or trusted friend.

   Find it on Amazon
3. The Let Them TheoryMel Robbins

   The Let Them Theory

   Mel Robbins · 2024

   Mel Robbins turns two words into a whole philosophy: stop trying to control what other people do, and put that energy back into your own life. Practical, punchy and very quotable.

   Best for: People-pleasers, over-functioners and anyone tired of carrying everyone else’s choices.

   Try this: The next time someone else’s choice frustrates you, say “let them” out loud, then ask, “what’s mine to do here?”

   Pairs with our post on boundaries every new mom needs.

   Find it on Amazon
4. UntamedGlennon Doyle

   Untamed

   Glennon Doyle · 2020

   A memoir-meets-manifesto about listening to yourself instead of everyone’s expectations. Raw, funny and the kind of book you underline and text photos of to your friends.

   Best for: Women at a crossroads, including big life changes like divorce.

   Try this: Read it with a pen. Notice which lines you underline, and ask yourself what they say about what you want.

   Pairs with our post on starting over after divorce.

   Find it on Amazon

💖 For being kinder to yourself

If your inner voice is meaner to you than you’d ever be to a friend, start with one of these.

1. The Gifts of ImperfectionBrené Brown

   The Gifts of Imperfection

   Brené Brown · 2010

   Brené Brown’s classic on letting go of who you think you’re supposed to be. Short, warm and rooted in her research on shame and courage.

   Best for: Recovering perfectionists and anyone who feels like they’re never enough.

   Try this: Pick one of her “guideposts” that stands out and focus on it for a week.

   Find it on Amazon
2. Self-CompassionKristin Neff

   Self-Compassion

   Kristin Neff · 2011

   The researcher who helped make self-compassion a field of study explains why being kind to yourself works better than being hard on yourself, with exercises you can actually do.

   Best for: Women with a loud inner critic, especially after a hard season.

   Try this: Try the simple practice of talking to yourself the way you’d talk to a struggling friend, out loud if you’re brave.

   Pairs with our post on fed is best.

   Find it on Amazon
3. BurnoutEmily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski

   Burnout

   Emily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski · 2019

   Twin sisters explain why women are so exhausted and how to complete the stress cycle, with science, humor and permission to rest.

   Best for: Working moms, caregivers and anyone running on empty.

   Try this: Pick one way to finish the stress cycle from the book, like movement, a long exhale or a real laugh, and do it every day for a week.

   Find it on Amazon

🍼 For moms and the mental load

Motherhood changes everything, including how much you’re carrying in your head. These books name it, explain it and help lighten it.

1. MatrescenceLucy Jones

   Matrescence

   Lucy Jones · 2023

   A beautiful, research-rich look at how becoming a mother changes your brain, body and identity. It gives a name to something so many women feel and nobody explains.

   Best for: New and expecting moms who want to understand what’s happening to them.

   Try this: Read it in small pieces, ideally with another mom, so you have someone to say “yes, that’s exactly it” to.

   Pairs with our post on getting your pink back.

   Find it on Amazon
2. CribsheetEmily Oster

   Cribsheet

   Emily Oster · 2019

   An economist looks at the actual data behind early parenting choices, including feeding, sleep and more, and gives you permission to decide what works for your family.

   Best for: Moms drowning in conflicting advice, especially about feeding.

   Try this: Skip to the chapters that match your current worry. It’s built to be read out of order.

   Pairs with our post on fed is best.

   Find it on Amazon
3. Fair PlayEve Rodsky

   Fair Play

   Eve Rodsky · 2019

   A practical system for dividing household and family work more fairly, so the invisible mental load isn’t all on you.

   Best for: Couples who keep arguing about who does what at home.

   Try this: Read it with your partner, even just the first few chapters, and choose one task to hand off completely.

   Find it on Amazon

🤝 For friendship, loss and finding your people

For the lonely seasons, the hard goodbyes and the slow, brave work of finding your people again.

1. PlatonicMarisa G. Franco

   Platonic

   Marisa G. Franco · 2022

   A psychologist explains why making and keeping friends as an adult is so hard, and what actually helps. Hopeful and very practical.

   Best for: Anyone who’s lonely, moved somewhere new or lost friends in a life change.

   Try this: After each chapter, text one person you’d like to be closer to. Small reach-outs add up.

   Pairs with our post on new mom loneliness.

   Find it on Amazon
2. It’s OK That You’re Not OKMegan Devine

   It’s OK That You’re Not OK

   Megan Devine · 2017

   Written by a therapist after her own partner died, this book refuses to rush grief or tidy it up. It’s a deep comfort for anyone who’s tired of being told to move on.

   Best for: Widows and anyone grieving a major loss, and the people who love them.

   Try this: There’s a section for supporters too. Consider sharing it with the people who want to help you but don’t know how.

   Pairs with our post on life after loss.

   Find it on Amazon

💪 For habits and strength

Because strong bodies and steady habits make everything else a little easier.

1. Atomic HabitsJames Clear

   Atomic Habits

   James Clear · 2018

   The go-to book on building habits that stick through tiny changes, better systems and making good choices easier. It pairs perfectly with coaching.

   Best for: Anyone who keeps restarting on Monday.

   Try this: Choose one tiny habit, like putting your sneakers by the door, and attach it to something you already do every day.

   Pairs with our post on how coaching works.

   Find it on Amazon
2. Next LevelStacy T. Sims

   Next Level

   Stacy T. Sims · 2022

   A physiologist’s guide to training, eating and feeling strong through perimenopause and menopause, written specifically for women’s bodies.

   Best for: Women in their 40s and beyond who want to stay strong. As always, check with your doctor about anything medical.

   Try this: Bring your questions to your doctor and your coach. Many women use it to rethink strength training and protein in midlife.

   Pairs with our post on non-scale wins.

   Find it on Amazon

Books to give a friend who’s going through it

Sometimes the best way to show up for a friend is to hand her a book with a note that says “this made me think of you.” A few gentle matches:

• For a brand-new mom: Matrescence, with a frozen meal and an offer to hold the baby while she showers.
• For a friend going through a divorce: Untamed or The Let Them Theory, plus a standing coffee date on her quiet weekends.
• For a friend who lost her partner: It’s OK That You’re Not OK, with a card that says you’ll keep checking in long after the casseroles stop.
• For the friend who does everything for everyone: Burnout, with a gift card for a massage and a promise to take something off her plate.
• For a friend who just moved: Platonic, and an invitation to walk club.

A book says “I see what you’re going through.” Your presence says the rest.

Honorable mentions

A few more our community loves that didn’t quite fit the list but are absolutely worth a look:

• Self Help by Gabrielle Bernstein (2023). Gabby’s more recent book, which brings ideas from Internal Family Systems therapy into everyday life. A good next read if you loved her earlier books.
• Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy (2022). A warm, practical parenting book for moms of toddlers and big kids who want to stay connected through meltdowns, theirs and yours.
• Atlas of the Heart by Brené Brown (2021). A beautiful guide to naming emotions, for anyone who wants better words for what they feel.

A note on self-help

We love a good self-help book, but we also want to be honest about what books can and can’t do.

Books are great at giving you language for what you’re feeling, new ideas to try and the comfort of knowing someone else has been there. What they can’t do is know your specific story, notice when you’re struggling or adjust when something isn’t working. That’s where people come in: friends, circles, coaches and, when needed, doctors and therapists.

It’s also okay if a book everyone loves doesn’t land for you. Authors have different styles. Some are spiritual, some are research-heavy and some are mostly memoir. If one doesn’t fit, it doesn’t mean you’re doing self-growth wrong. It just means another book, or another kind of support, might suit you better.

And if you notice you’re reading self-help to try to “fix” yourself because you feel broken, please be gentle. You’re not a project. You’re a person in progress, like all of us.

How to read with no time

“I used to love reading” is one of the most common things we hear from busy women. If that’s you, here are a few ways to make books fit back into real life:

• Listen instead. Audiobooks count. Listen on walks, in the car, while folding laundry or during a 3 a.m. feed. Several authors on this list narrate their own books.
• Use your library. Apps like Libby let you borrow ebooks and audiobooks for free with a library card, right from your phone.
• Read ten pages. Not a chapter, not an hour. Ten pages before bed adds up to a whole book in a few weeks.
• Keep it where you are. A book in the diaper bag, on the nightstand and on your phone means you can read whenever a pocket of time appears.
• Pair it with movement. An audiobook on a walk is self-care twice over. Bring one to walk club and swap recommendations.
• Give yourself permission to quit. If a book isn’t working for you, put it down. Life’s too short and nap time is shorter.

Start a book circle

Books are even better when you talk about them with friends. If you’ve been wanting a reason to get together, a book circle is a lovely one. Here’s a simple way to start:

1. Invite three to six women. Small enough that everyone talks, big enough that it still happens when someone cancels.
2. Pick a book from this list. Shorter books like The Gifts of Imperfection or The Universe Has Your Back are great first picks.
3. Set a date four to six weeks out. Enough time for busy readers, including the audiobook crowd.
4. Choose a cozy format. Coffee on a Saturday, a walk-and-talk, or a cameras-optional video call after bedtime.
5. Bring a few questions. What surprised you? What did you disagree with? What’s one thing you’ll try?
6. Let it be about more than the book. Some of the best book clubs barely talk about the book at all. That’s the point.

If you’d rather join one than start one, we’re gathering interest for a Pink in Progress book circle. Our virtual circles work the same way: small groups, a friendly host and plenty of laughs.

Questions that work for almost any book on this list

• Which part of this book felt most true for your life right now?
• Was there anything you pushed back on or disagreed with?
• What’s one small thing you want to try because of this book?
• Who would you recommend this book to, and why?
• If the author joined us for coffee, what would you ask her?

Your turn

Reading is one of the simplest forms of self-care there is. It’s quiet, it’s cheap (or free, with a library card) and it reminds you that you’re not the only one who has ever felt this way. That’s a big part of what we’re building here, too.

We’d love to know what’s on your nightstand. Tell us your favorite book for finding your strength when you fill out the form, mention it at walk club or share it in your circle. We’ll keep adding community favorites to this list.

And if one of these books stirs up something you want to work on, whether that’s habits, strength, boundaries or simply feeling more like yourself, our coaches and community are here to help you put it into practice. Read more about how coaching and community work together.

• Book list
• Self-help books
• Motherhood
• Gabby Bernstein
• Reading